Navigating the Holidays When There’s No Home to Visit

The holidays can be a magical time filled with love, laughter, and togetherness—or at least, that’s what we’re taught to expect. But for many of us, the season comes with a heavy heart. Maybe it’s because there’s no home to visit, or maybe because you’ve chosen peace over tradition. If you’re feeling this, you’re not alone.

For me, the holidays have shifted over the years. With a strained relationship with my mom, not being welcomed into my father’s family, and the loss of my grandmother, the once cherished family gatherings are no longer part of my reality. It’s bittersweet to acknowledge because it contrasts so sharply with the idealized holiday moments we see on social media and hear about everywhere. The feeling of having no home to visit during the holidays feels isolating.

But here’s what I’ve learned: even when the traditional image of the holidays fades away, there’s still space to create something beautiful.

Acknowledging the Grief

Grieving the holidays as you knew them is valid. Whether it’s due to family trauma, loss, or simply the boundaries you’ve set to protect your peace, the emotions tied to this season can be complex.

If you’ve experienced the death of a loved one who was the glue holding the family together, it’s natural to feel a void during this time. If you’ve chosen to step back from toxic relationships to prioritize your mental health, you might feel guilt or sadness mixed with relief. And if you find yourself navigating a new chapter of life—away from old traditions—you might wonder how to find your footing again.

You’re not wrong for feeling any of this. Your emotions are valid, and it’s okay to sit with them.

Creating New Traditions

When I became a mother, I knew I wanted to create something different for my daughter. While I miss the big family gatherings of my childhood, I’ve learned that the holidays are an opportunity to build traditions that fill my heart in new ways.

Every year, I host a Friendsgiving before Thanksgiving. It’s my way of bringing my community together to express gratitude and celebrate the connections that matter most. And during the holidays, I gift my daughter experiences rather than things—showing her the beauty of exploring the world and creating memories that last far longer than any present under the tree.

Whether it’s hosting a gathering with friends, volunteering, traveling, or starting small traditions at home, you have the power to create a holiday that feels good to you.

For Those Who Have a Home but Choose Peace

If you have a “home” to go to but have chosen not to visit this year, I see you too. Setting boundaries during the holidays can be one of the hardest decisions, especially when family or cultural expectations are involved. But choosing peace over tradition is a brave act of self-love.

It’s okay to honor your needs, even if it means breaking the mold of what the holidays “should” look like. Your mental and emotional well-being matters, and stepping away from environments that no longer feel safe is a decision worth celebrating.

Holding Space for Gratitude and Hope

The holidays don’t have to look like they do in the movies to be meaningful. They can be quiet, unconventional, or completely reimagined. What matters is that they align with what you need in this season of your life.

If you’re feeling the weight of not having a home to return to or the sting of loss, remind yourself that this is an opportunity to redefine what the holidays mean to you. Grieve what you’ve lost, but don’t lose sight of what you can create.

This year, I’m reminding myself—and I hope you will too—that the holidays are about connection, whether that’s with yourself, your chosen family, or the world around you. You deserve joy, love, and peace this season, and it’s okay if it looks different than it did before.

A Thought to Hold On To

You are not alone in feeling what you feel. Whether this season brings joy, grief, or a mix of both, you are loved, seen, and supported. The beauty of the holidays is that they’re yours to shape—so give yourself the gift of grace and the permission to celebrate in a way that nourishes your soul.

Here’s to creating traditions that heal, memories that inspire, and moments that remind you of your strength. You are enough, exactly as you are. And remember, even if you have no home to visit, the holidays can still be special.

Happy holidays, however you choose to spend them. 💛